Wednesday, July 21, 2010

If Only I Know...

So I fancy this doctor in my hospital and I don't know if he's gay or straight. We talk all the time whenever we see each other and as far as I know he's Greek, he's between 35-40 and he's still a bachelor. How to tackle this common problem? Please help!

6 comments:

alx said...

I think you should ask him to get together outside of the hospital, maybe for coffee, or beers, lol. And just talk to him. Or you could ask him out right if he likes ladies or gents, but then it might be awkward to see him again >_<
In any case good luck!

Anonymous said...

don't rush it...build up your friendship & respect his privacy...things can get awkward at the workplace if u come across as a desperate gay stalker...

-torchwood

Jeremiah Andrews said...

Hey there,

Non chalant conversation using euphemisms or slang du jour is usually a sign.

You could ask where he goes to hang out, and see if he answers with the appropriate answers.

I would play it cool though, you don't want to find yourself in trouble with the establishment.

What does your gut tell you? And if it speaks to you, what will you do with that information?

Ask him to friendly outing if you fancy him that much to ask. See what happens. Lay the groundwork and see where that gets you in your info trek.

Keep us posted.

Jeremy

Kian said...

I can never tell if your talking about yourself or quoting something you saw online >_<

If its you i would suggest caution, for starters if he is a friend you don't wanna make things weird and risk loosing a potentially fulfilling friendship.

But thats not exactly a reason to give up either, we of all people should know what kinda things = gay, use normal conversations to try and pick up on these things and try to look at them from an unbiased perspective, things like music tastes, a good one is the reaction to, what kind of girl do you like or what do you look for in a girlfriend, consider how you responded to that question or still do, depending, also make sure to have your own answer ready.

Of course not making it completely obvious, and remembering if he catches on, don't panic and try acting straight and uninterested because if he is gay and possibly interested you'll risk scaring him off for good.

Start with friends, and go slowly, keeping in mind he may be as unsure as you, we are not actually that uncommon ya know.

Lastly make sure you play it safe, and i mean that in the literal sense, you can never guess the kind of reaction someone may have no matter how well you think you know them, so many gays are beaten half to death and sometimes further with those responsible using the "unwanted sexual advances" as an excuse.... as if thats good enough >_>

This is an even bigger issue if they are a closet case in deep denial, they take their confusion and anger out the the people they dont want to be like.

To summarize, always consider your own safety, take it slowly, but dont let any of the risks get in the way of your being happy, everything in life has an inherent risk involved, this is no different.

Decide what you want and then go for it, life is to short for if's, buts and maybes..... well its to short for some buts.... >.>

Hope this helps a little :)

PR8 said...

LOL! This time I'm talking about myself and thanks for all your advice! I think I'm gonna play it cool and take it slow =]

Anonymous said...

Doctors are notorious for marrying late because of all the crazy hours they have to work and the exams. Don't assume just because he's single at 35, that he might be gay.
Build up the relationship in other ways before exploring this alley.